"We'll find it tomorrow," I said when Genesis told me she had lost her shoe in the backseat of our Ford Edge. It was a Friday afternoon and I was tired. I just wanted to get everyone OUT of the car and INTO to house so I could finally relax. All three of us exited the car and I totally forgot about said shoe until Monday morning.
The following Monday, Genesis picked out another pair of shoes and we ran out the door like we do most mornings. She casually mentioned the shoe again which prompted me to look around the floorboards and under the seat. No shoe. That's OK, I thought. We needed to get to school. I would look again that afternoon.
I started looking for the shoe that afternoon. Where is that stupid, blue shoe? At this point, I started sweating as I'm peeling layers of artwork, markers and discarded snack bags. I'm also starting to doubt and question my parenting skills. "Did I let my daughter into the car with one shoe?" No, surely not me. I have it all together.
About this same time, Genesis told her dad that she had lost a shoe. I said it wasn't lost. But, deep down I feared the worst. I had let my daughter into the car with one shoe on. He marched out to the Edge and repeated exactly what I had been doing 30 minutes before. Then the questioning started. "How do you lose a shoe?!" he shouted.
At that moment, I felt like such a failure. I know, it's just a shoe, but it was the principal. How did this happen and why didn't I try to find it at the moment? I told him I would drive by after care on my way to work and look for the shoe in the parking lot. I did. No shoe.
That afternoon, I asked the nice lady at the aftercare if anyone had turned in a shoe. She looked puzzled and then gave me a sweet smile, "we haven't had any shoes returned."
I was late to work that morning and frustrated. This damn shoe was haunting me. It made me feel careless and haphazard. Dang it, where are you shoe?
I tore the car apart again that night and went back to the parking lot. I even made a Facebook live video asking other moms if they had similar situations to share. The feedback was phenomenal. I wasn't alone.
I guess that's what I needed to hear. Other moms have lost articles of clothes or tangible, silly things. I'm slowly letting it go and moving on. Wherever you are blue shoe, I hope you are living a good life and may you never know the crazy path you led me down. I forgive you.
The following Monday, Genesis picked out another pair of shoes and we ran out the door like we do most mornings. She casually mentioned the shoe again which prompted me to look around the floorboards and under the seat. No shoe. That's OK, I thought. We needed to get to school. I would look again that afternoon.
I started looking for the shoe that afternoon. Where is that stupid, blue shoe? At this point, I started sweating as I'm peeling layers of artwork, markers and discarded snack bags. I'm also starting to doubt and question my parenting skills. "Did I let my daughter into the car with one shoe?" No, surely not me. I have it all together.
About this same time, Genesis told her dad that she had lost a shoe. I said it wasn't lost. But, deep down I feared the worst. I had let my daughter into the car with one shoe on. He marched out to the Edge and repeated exactly what I had been doing 30 minutes before. Then the questioning started. "How do you lose a shoe?!" he shouted.
At that moment, I felt like such a failure. I know, it's just a shoe, but it was the principal. How did this happen and why didn't I try to find it at the moment? I told him I would drive by after care on my way to work and look for the shoe in the parking lot. I did. No shoe.
That afternoon, I asked the nice lady at the aftercare if anyone had turned in a shoe. She looked puzzled and then gave me a sweet smile, "we haven't had any shoes returned."
I was late to work that morning and frustrated. This damn shoe was haunting me. It made me feel careless and haphazard. Dang it, where are you shoe?
I tore the car apart again that night and went back to the parking lot. I even made a Facebook live video asking other moms if they had similar situations to share. The feedback was phenomenal. I wasn't alone.
I guess that's what I needed to hear. Other moms have lost articles of clothes or tangible, silly things. I'm slowly letting it go and moving on. Wherever you are blue shoe, I hope you are living a good life and may you never know the crazy path you led me down. I forgive you.
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